Ah yes, another worthy recipient of the Darwin award. Two, actually. This reminds me of a similar individual. I may be one of the few people who will gladly award the Darwin to one of their own relatives - my grandfather. Having left Italy under circumstances that will forever remain a mystery, he started a new life in America while maintaining his hatred for americans, refusing to learn English and just being an all-around asshole. He lived the last week and a half of his life screaming in agony due to appendicitis which eventually resulted in burst, death. See, he didn't trust american doctors so he opted to die slowly and painfully out of pride (ignorance). Thus, I hereby present my version of the Darwin award to my guinea grampaps - Bonjourno, beeotch!

I had a couple old relatives who froze to deat one winter because they were too cheap to buy fuel oil. The really crazy part was that when we went to clean out their house we found stashes of cash every where. $20K hidden in the back of the TV. And about a dozen others almost as big. They had almost $200K in the house and died because they were cheap and dumb. They should get a Darwin too.

I want to die like this!

Leave me alone ya bastards! I can't trust any of ya, yer all out to take my money or my beer...just throw me my cane so's I can gets to me feets...

Pity. Social Security was clearly wasted in them.