Apologies for the Paris Hilton Watch, but shit has been slow lately. Also, this one is really just about irresistable.

'My friend's brother (who works with [Sheriff Lee] Baca's assistant sheriffs) told me that Paris was released due to a severe, 'stress-induced' herpes outbreak. He also said that he heard that the blisters had apparently spread to her anus and had taken on abcess-like features that required more serious medical attention. Thus, after taking into account jail overcrowding, the increasing liability that Paris presents, and Paris's lesions, all things weighed in favor of her being put on home confinement.'

http://www.wwtdd.com/

In regards to being Paris Hilton, she's pitch perfect.

Fantastic.

BFF forever!

I wanna see some nasty pics of her and the other inmates. Where is LS's power to unearth said materials?

Seeing her cry gives me a boner.

'The lap dance is always better when the stripper is crying....'

hehe, Paris has herpes in her pooper

or does she have poopies in her herper??

This is the best thing.

Looove that action...

CURRENTLY ENJOYING A PARIS HILTON TEARBONER, THX GOD.

HAHAHAHAHAHA


Seriously.


HAHAHAHAHAHA

Am I the only one to hope someone stabs her?

I hope she gets stabbed with a broom handle.

In her anus.

On film preferably.

God, what I would give to be a lesbonic jail-guard right now. Can your clit get a boner?

This is so fucking good, honestly, I don't think it could get better or any more irrisistable...unless of course, what Wrecker mentioned happens.

http://www.cnn.com/2007/SHOWBIZ/TV/06/09/paris.hilton.killed.in.prison.ap/

Good night, sweet prince.

HAHA

This would be better:

Paris' mom stabbed with a broom handle.

In her anus.

On film preferably.

For rasin' a ho.

That's some herpies-assed ho there. I'm gonna tell you that now, man, that's some -- woo.

Oh fuck this is fantastic!

Tommy Chong vs. MSNBC