Cornell University researchers are reporting what appears to be a statistically significant relationship between autism rates and television watching by children under the age of 3.
As the Gospel of the Flying Spaghetti Monster has taught us, Correlation ALWAYS EQUALS causation. Exactly like the decline in the number of pirates since 1880 leading directly to the rise of global temperatures.
I still blame live-virus vaccinations, mercury, lead and that old favorite, aspartame.
Oh... and your mom.
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