come on folks don't be shy, lets here your worst Jewish jokes . u know u wanna

What's the difference between a Jew and a Pizza?
A pizza doesn't scream when you put it in the oven...

What's the difference between a Jew and can opener?

15

Two Jews walk into a bar. One of them drinks a beer, one of them drinks wine. The wine drinking Jew turns to the beer drinker and say, 'Wow, this wine is giving me a buzz.' To which the beer drinking Jew replies,'Oh yeah, we don't look now but I think our bartender is the Danny Glover.'

A Jewish woman had 2 chickens. One got sick, so the woman made chicken soup out of the other one to help the sick one get well.

A Jewish man pulls up to the curb and asks the policeman 'Can I park here?' 'No' says the cop. 'What about all these other cars?' 'They didn't ask!'

Why do Jewish divorces cost so much? They're worth it.

Why do Jewish men die before their wives? They want to.

Why don't Jews drink? It interferes with their suffering.

I asked a Jewish man 'Do you know where Michigan Avenue is?' He said 'Yes', and walked away.

A car hit a Jewish man. The paramedic says, 'Are you comfortable?' The man says, 'I make a good living.'

2 Jewish women in New York, one says, 'Do you see what's going on in Poland?' The other says 'I live in the back, I don't see anything.'

Q:How does a Jew sign a check?
A:With two bicuspids.

Q:What do you call a Jew with a lisp?
A: Ipod

Q:How do you draw a proper star of david ?
A:In blood drawn from a rapist.

'Repeat after me. I promise to be different! I promise to be unique! I promise not to repeat things other people tell me to repeat!'