If the list does not include me, the list must be bogus.

They were going to include you but your kid was sick.

If you weren't so engrossed in BF2 you could have told them my kid isn't sick anymore. HEADSHOT!

He wasn't sick in the first place, you ham-headed buffoon. That's the fucking point.

M-M-M-M-MONSTER KILL

actually, it DID include you. Number four. You make me fucking sick.

vile, rat-toad heart

Nice.

If Pat Robertson’s local Starbucks caught fire, he would claim that God was punishing them for giving him a caramel latte when he ordered vanilla.

gold.

When I was maybe 15, I remember sitting down and watching pat robertson and being like 'here is a very nice, old christian man who seems very decent and honest' and then he started talking about homosexuals burning and the whole image crumbled.

#4 seems a bit over the top though.

26. Spammers

Charges: Wasting billions of minutes of time and millions of dollars in bandwidth on the thin hope that a few poor saps will be stupid enough to believe that a Nigerian banker actually wants to give them millions of dollars, or that responding to an unsolicited e-mail is the smart way to refinance their mortgage or enlarge their penis. Every day, we must perform the tedious task of combing through our e-mail and deleting the nine tenths of it which consist of the most retarded marketing in history, along with mean-spirited swindles and ads for the vilest pornography imaginable. All because these jack-offs can think of no better way to support themselves than by pestering the entire fucking planet.

Exhibit A: Your inbox.
Exhibit B: Linkswarm Submissions
Sentence: Faces repeatedly smashed into keyboards until dead; bodies made into actual Spam; greedily devoured by Nigerian bankers.