CAP Alert (Insane) Christian Movie Reviews
Belly - 'I am a hard and severe man and can break three sandwiched boards with a single forward punch...but I could not stomach this movie.'

by drbloor 1336 Reads
on Fri Oct 01 2004 Add to your ClipSwarm
< Interview:Drew Curtis(Fark) Faces Of Frustration >



SexNinjaFri Oct 01
 
I think this site deserves the Golden LOL Award.
 
 
LORDKAHUNAFri Oct 01
 
Hey it won 'Best of the Christian Web Award'
WOOHOO!
This is the worst looking site I have ever seen, and who would take this guys opinion?
Image Hosted by ImageShack.us
'Stay away from that funny looking man kids.'
 
 
ghostriderFri Oct 01
 
HAY! that's my fukin 7th grade gym teacher
 
 
tantrumFri Oct 01
 
HAHA weird.Check out the American Psycho 'Findings':

Wanton Violence/Crime (W):

-butcher knife as solo object in lead-in
-threats to kill, one with perversion
-expression of killing being a drug with addictive properties
-cover-up maneuvers
-human head in refrigerator
-toying with knives while talking to date
-holding nailgun todate'shead
-threatening murder
-two bloody bodies hanging in closet
-yanking sheets off exposing bloody face (cannibalism)
-chasing prostitute (while chaser is nude) with a chain saw
-confession of murders to lawyer
-notepad drawings of extreme bizarre imagery: perversion, vulgarity, murder, blood, nudity, rape, dismemberment, cannibalism, more

Impudence/Hate (I)(1):

-27 uses of the most foul of the foul words
-20 uses of the three/four letter word vocabulary
-punk dress
-orders to lie
-sexual obsession over business cards
-sitting studiously over victim's body after murder
-laughing and crying at the same time with screaming in a mad frenzy, repeatedly

Sex/Homosexuality (S):

-many scenes of full rear male nudity
-long sequence of adult male in briefs only plus additional scenes of adults in underwear
-talk of sexually immoral behavior
-porno pictures
-intercourse with nudity in a porno video, repeating
homosexual presence
-most vulgar sexual comments
-nudity in bathtub
-order to strip clothes
-adults in underwear doing vulgar dance
-ordering perversion between two prostitutes
-group intercourse with nudity
-homosexual approach
-plaque of nudity
-buying prostitutes
-inappropriate touching
-intercourse between two with nudity
adult male in shower


YAY
 
 
vasudevaFri Oct 01
 
'Punk dress'?
 
 
tantrumFri Oct 01
 
HAHA, no shit, dude. That one stood out for me too.
 
 
LORDKAHUNAFri Oct 01
 
-chasing prostitute (while chaser is nude) with a chain saw=unacceptable

Chasing hooker with chainsaw while fully clothed=acceptable.
 
 
azron123Fri Oct 01
 
WTF!?!

Sexual obsession over business cards
 
 
LORDKAHUNAFri Oct 01
 
-nudity in bathtub
hahaha!
 
 
freakmachineFri Oct 01
 
Please tell me this site is a parody. Like Landover Batist, right?
 
 
ragooFri Oct 01
 
Nope. That's 100% genuine right wing ultrapuritanicalism you smell. Ahhhh.
 
 
kungfu-squirrelFri Oct 01
 
wow, they must really have nothing better to do with their time. Any person that sits and counts the amount of 'foul, vulgar language' in 8 mile really needs to get out more.

368 uses in 105 minutes by the way.
 
 
dragonstaffFri Oct 01
 
Yeah , they hate this stuff but sit there and go through it with a fine-toothed comb. How many times does he watch each one to get that sort of detail?
 
 
tantrumFri Oct 01
 
Dingo!..er..I mean Bingo!
 
 
drbloorSat Oct 02
 
before turning his attention to movie reviews, Capalert webmaster Thomas A. Carder wrote a 212 page book entitled 'Handling of Radiation Accident Patients by Paramedical and Hospital Personnel'.

this was possibly before his brain was fried by a massive dose of said radiation.

oh well... i am off to rent me Toy Story 2. 'many Barbie(tm) dolls dancing in swimwear while characters ogle at them with sensuous expressions '
 
 
SexNinjaSat Oct 02
 
Dude, you're going to hell.
 
 


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