Steel
If you want to keep your tongue, don't lick me in the Winter!   SSHOLE |
Posts: 512 Registered: 10/14/2004 Offline
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6/29/2007 at 19:59 |
Vince is a musician struggling for a break. When an old friend tells him that they are short lead guitar for one gig, out in the middle of nowhere, Vinnie jumps on the opportunity to play.
Leaving his wife and daughter Vinnie makes the trek to the gig, playing a great show, even gets the chance for a solo cover of “Blower’s Daughter”.
At the end of the night the band is moving on in one direction, while Vinnie decides to hitch home, rather than waiting for the morning bus.
After a time Vinnie is picked up by a friendly enough looking red-neck type in a pickup and they engage in interesting conversation, eventually bringing them to Ethel’s Diner for a bite.
While in the diner we are introduce to Ethel, a large brutish man, the owner/operator of the establishment. Among other patrons, we will take note of a teenage runaway type, under the control of a police officer.
Vinnie will find to the chagrin of the red-neck driver and Ethel that he has been drugged and will awake to the screams of the young girl we first noticed at the diner.
Handcuffed and otherwise restrained Vince will have to endure watching the rape and torture of this young girl, his spurting obscenities and threats will have no effect on the two men beating on the girl. Relief will set in when Vinnie notices the police officer from the Diner creeping silently into the room, only to find that the officer is also in on the kidnapping and torture to which he has become witness.
The girl will be killed and left to rot, in the hot barn where Vinnie is being held and left for what feels like days, Vince is subject to uncontrollable fits of screaming and vomiting.
Eventually Ethel will return to clean up the mess and prepare for the next nights festivities where Vince himself will be the main course. Yes this is not going to a super fun time for our hero…
Luckily for Vinnie, after having been beaten furiously and sodomized by the three men, he will narrowly escape, removing one of the rednecks ears in the process and be able to make it back to his now empty home.
Remembering back to the police officer taking a good long look at his drivers license, Vinnie gets his hometown police involved in the search for the barn where he was held and Ethel’s diner, neither of which can be found. (Why you ask? Not sure!)
Having a solid alibi, Vince is not suspected in the disappearance of his wife and daughter.
Over the next number of months, to a year, Vinnie becomes obsessed with the Criminal mind, maps of the area, missing persons’ reports, etc.
After the official case gets closed due to lack of man-power or leads, Vinnie sets off to enact his plan, he is certain that his family is dead at the hands of the men he escaped from and though he has obtained some crucial information to the case his desire for vengeance has kept these tidbits secret.
Vinnie has no idea how to find the barn where he was tortured, nor the identities of the officer or the redneck involved in his previous encounter, however he did finally find Ethel’s Diner and one late night enters…
There will be a nice gory fight scene here (read the screenplay for what we have in mind) but essentially Vince will get quite stabby, but allowing Ethel the opportunity to press the security call button notifying the officer to the situation, before groggy and bleeding, Vinnie finishes off Ethel with the cash register to the body…. Numerous times…
Vinnie will all but allow himself to be snuck up on by the officer, who will provide a nice shotgun butt to the head.
Waking again in the same barn, manacled in the same fashion as before, Vinnie now uses his escape method planned for this very circumstance. ( Oh Snap…Read the script for this explanation too)
Here though we have not totally plotted out the sequence we plan for a clumsy fight sequence between Vinnie and the officer… The thought is for Vinnies’ escape from shackles to be punctuated by his scream, then total silence except for the Foo Fighters song “Razor”.
Click the “Razor” link.
The officer will be dead by the end of the song and we will have captured the redneck (now missing an arm due to earlier events) who promises to divulge the location of Vince’s wife and daughter in exchange for his life.
Vinnie will club the man quite hard and go to meet his now decomposed wife and daughter whose remains were buried lightly in a clearing, as Damien Rice’s “Blower’s Daughter” starts playing again, Vinnie will dig away the grass and dirt with his hands revealing their rotting bodies.
Blower’s Daughter - I suggest you let the music play but not watch the video, unless your eyes like to feel like they are being sodomized by three men.
He will flash back and forth from the present to when he last lay in bed with his family the day he left for his gig. Vinnie will pop pills and lay down with his family as the screen fades away and the flick ends…
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LORDKAHUNA
Don't make me fuk your moustache  SSHOLEPosts: 1669 Registered: 8/5/2003 Offline
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6/29/2007 at 20:01 |
These are just plot points that we have chugged out whilst "working".
They are not sacred and they can change, think of it as just the skeleton of a story.
We will need meat.
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the rice I had yesterday came out practically verbatim |
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JohnLenin
Putting the semen in amusement  SSHOLEPosts: 1103 Registered: 7/8/2005 Offline
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6/29/2007 at 21:06 |
There definitely needs to be more gore. for example: In his mad obsession he kidnaps and tortures someone for info, someone he recognizes from the night of the gig. Even better if the person turns out to be completely innocent.
I downloaded and registered with celtx, so I'm ready to go with input. I can also contribute storyboard sketches.
I'd really like to see that script, gents. |
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JohnLenin
Putting the semen in amusement SSHOLEPosts: 1103 Registered: 7/8/2005 Offline
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6/30/2007 at 00:17 |
alright, I checked it out and made some notes. I think that if we are to keep this organized, we should have an open discussion of our ideas and maybe even assign different chunks to different writers (for rough drafts) just to streamline it a touch. I'll be chillin in #openmovie for some active discussion. you know the server. peace out. |
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LORDKAHUNA
Don't make me fuk your moustache SSHOLEPosts: 1669 Registered: 8/5/2003 Offline
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6/30/2007 at 00:18 |
guitarjon123: There definitely needs to be more gore. for example: In his mad obsession he kidnaps and tortures someone for info, someone he recognizes from the night of the gig. Even better if the person turns out to be completely innocent.
Oh, that is fucking awesometits!
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the rice I had yesterday came out practically verbatim |
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LORDKAHUNA
Don't make me fuk your moustache SSHOLEPosts: 1669 Registered: 8/5/2003 Offline
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6/30/2007 at 00:21 |
#openmovie
YES YES YES
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tantrum
I'm a big boy now!  SSHOLEPosts: 474 Registered: 11/23/2003 Offline
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7/6/2007 at 02:16 |
Luckily for Vinnie, after having been beaten furiously and sodomized by the three men, he will narrowly escape, removing one of the rednecks ears in the process and be able to make it back to his now empty home.
I vote for no butt fucking. Somehow, once protagonist gets sodomized, it's hard to get passed. Whenever they appear on screen again, there's always a little voice in the audience's head that whispers, "that guy's a faggot."
I have an idea...and I'm serious, it sounds crazy but let it sit with you for a minute.
As the first rapist lines up to fuck Vinnie up the ass...in an act of self defense, Vinnie let's loose with a vile stream of shit which erupts all over the rapist's midsection.
Maybe this outrageous act somehow segue into Vinnie's escape.
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JohnLenin
Putting the semen in amusement SSHOLEPosts: 1103 Registered: 7/8/2005 Offline
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7/6/2007 at 02:20 |
LOL WUT?! |
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LORDKAHUNA
Don't make me fuk your moustache SSHOLEPosts: 1669 Registered: 8/5/2003 Offline
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7/6/2007 at 02:45 |
tantrum: Luckily for Vinnie, after having been beaten furiously and sodomized by the three men, he will narrowly escape, removing one of the rednecks ears in the process and be able to make it back to his now empty home.
I vote for no butt fucking. Somehow, once protagonist gets sodomized, it's hard to get passed. Whenever they appear on screen again, there's always a little voice in the audience's head that whispers, "that guy's a faggot."
I have an idea...and I'm serious, it sounds crazy but let it sit with you for a minute.
As the first rapist lines up to fuck Vinnie up the ass...in an act of self defense, Vinnie let's loose with a vile stream of shit which erupts all over the rapist's midsection.
Maybe this outrageous act somehow segue into Vinnie's escape.
I dunno, but I see what you are saying, the shit defence seems almost cartoony and I know that applying the nitpicker approach to this would seem stupid. I can agree that the Zulu shit punch would probably be a first, but I don't think it would ever screen.
When we approached the idea of Vinnie, we were wondering what would be the worst things that can happen to a dude, buttfuck by rednex scored high on the list.
I remember watching a really bad movie at Vasudeva's place that had one of the most brutal scenes I have ever seen. It involved a jail cell shared by 4 dudes (2 bunkbeds), a noob, a retard, a bookish old dude and a huge pre-op transvestite/bodybuilder. One night the lower bunk noob awakens to the sound of bed springs squeaking, he looks up and sees the bookish oldster's head poking out over the side of the top bunk, then the veiny forehead of the tranny poking over his shoulder riding him like a horsey.
It was really terrible, and it didn't make me think that the old dude was a faggot, it did make me think that that shit sucks.
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the rice I had yesterday came out practically verbatim |
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tantrum
I'm a big boy now! SSHOLEPosts: 474 Registered: 11/23/2003 Offline
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7/6/2007 at 02:57 |
LORDKAHUNA: tantrum: Luckily for Vinnie, after having been beaten furiously and sodomized by the three men, he will narrowly escape, removing one of the rednecks ears in the process and be able to make it back to his now empty home.
I vote for no butt fucking. Somehow, once protagonist gets sodomized, it's hard to get passed. Whenever they appear on screen again, there's always a little voice in the audience's head that whispers, "that guy's a faggot."
I have an idea...and I'm serious, it sounds crazy but let it sit with you for a minute.
As the first rapist lines up to fuck Vinnie up the ass...in an act of self defense, Vinnie let's loose with a vile stream of shit which erupts all over the rapist's midsection.
Maybe this outrageous act somehow segue into Vinnie's escape.
I dunno, but I see what you are saying, the shit defence seems almost cartoony and I know that applying the nitpicker approach to this would seem stupid. I can agree that the Zulu shit punch would probably be a first, but I don't think it would ever screen.
So maybe let's refine the scene to make it less cartoony, which I agree, "spray all over midsection" reeks a little of demented Looney Toons.
In a sad and somewhat futile effort to delay rape, Vinnie shits himself. In disgust, the rapist beats Vinnie to an apparent unconscious state and leaves to find something to clean up the mess...
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LORDKAHUNA
Don't make me fuk your moustache SSHOLEPosts: 1669 Registered: 8/5/2003 Offline
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7/6/2007 at 03:00 |
tantrum: LORDKAHUNA: tantrum: Luckily for Vinnie, after having been beaten furiously and sodomized by the three men, he will narrowly escape, removing one of the rednecks ears in the process and be able to make it back to his now empty home.
I vote for no butt fucking. Somehow, once protagonist gets sodomized, it's hard to get passed. Whenever they appear on screen again, there's always a little voice in the audience's head that whispers, "that guy's a faggot."
I have an idea...and I'm serious, it sounds crazy but let it sit with you for a minute.
As the first rapist lines up to fuck Vinnie up the ass...in an act of self defense, Vinnie let's loose with a vile stream of shit which erupts all over the rapist's midsection.
Maybe this outrageous act somehow segue into Vinnie's escape.
I dunno, but I see what you are saying, the shit defence seems almost cartoony and I know that applying the nitpicker approach to this would seem stupid. I can agree that the Zulu shit punch would probably be a first, but I don't think it would ever screen.
So maybe let's refine the scene to make it less cartoony, which I agree, "spray all over midsection" reeks a little of demented Looney Toons.
In a sad and somewhat futile effort to delay rape, Vinnie shits himself. In disgust, the rapist beats Vinnie to an apparent unconscious state and leaves to find something to clean up the mess...
Ok I can live with that, consensus?
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the rice I had yesterday came out practically verbatim |
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tantrum
I'm a big boy now! SSHOLEPosts: 474 Registered: 11/23/2003 Offline
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7/6/2007 at 03:12 |
LORDKAHUNA: When we approached the idea of Vinnie, we were wondering what would be the worst things that can happen to a dude, buttfuck by rednex scored high on the list.
I remember watching a really bad movie at Vasudeva's place that had one of the most brutal scenes I have ever seen. It involved a jail cell shared by 4 dudes (2 bunkbeds), a noob, a retard, a bookish old dude and a huge pre-op transvestite/bodybuilder. One night the lower bunk noob awakens to the sound of bed springs squeaking, he looks up and sees the bookish oldster's head poking out over the side of the top bunk, then the veiny forehead of the tranny poking over his shoulder riding him like a horsey.
It was really terrible, and it didn't make me think that the old dude was a faggot, it did make me think that that shit sucks.
If Batman got fucked up the ass by the Joker, would you still feel the same about Batman afterward?
I just think the man rape thing has been done. That's not to say we couldn't find a way to do it RIGHT.  |
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JohnLenin
Putting the semen in amusement SSHOLEPosts: 1103 Registered: 7/8/2005 Offline
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7/6/2007 at 03:42 |
I think it's fine the way it is. It could always have a twist, like he gets sodomized with a [insert obscure object here] or something, but it works, and its really less of a major detail in the big picture of it all (wife and kid, y0) |
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LORDKAHUNA
Don't make me fuk your moustache SSHOLEPosts: 1669 Registered: 8/5/2003 Offline
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7/9/2007 at 03:26 |
guitarjon123: alright, I checked it out and made some notes. I think that if we are to keep this organized, we should have an open discussion of our ideas and maybe even assign different chunks to different writers (for rough drafts) just to streamline it a touch. I'll be chillin in #openmovie for some active discussion. you know the server. peace out.
Channel changed to #openmovieproject.
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the rice I had yesterday came out practically verbatim |
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Steel
If you want to keep your tongue, don't lick me in the Winter! SSHOLEPosts: 512 Registered: 10/14/2004 Offline
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7/15/2007 at 21:52 |
BUMP. Hey guys, today I have uploaded a new version of the master file.
This weekend LK and I reworked the first few sections (yes we know we need to write new sections too!)
We like the beginning a lot better and added a few new plot sections I will explain below.
For those members with access, please feel free to download the latest copy following the steps in the How To thread.
For those of you who just want to read the new stuff you can visit (and bookmark) the webpage where the screenplay links can be clicked.
Additional plot points!
- Vinnie adds a small pistol to his guitar case.
** The thought here is that near the end...When Vinnie gets himself captured, he will find his guitar case in the stack of luggage (oh Look for that addition too) Then he will barge out to confront the BADCOP (Lets get this guy a name) and will pop pop pop him in the chest with the low cal pistol, the cop of course wont even fall as he is wearing kevlar, the cop smirks, Vinnie will looked confused for a second, then put his last bullet into the cops leg...
We had always thought that the final fight between Vinnie and the cop will be clumsy... Vinnie isn't a pro...the cop is... this gunshot to the leg should help even things slightly...
- Point #2
We've added a couple connections... You find out Vinnie used to roll with the rock band at the beginning and used to "have fun" with Cindy a new character...
Vinnie will off handedly see Cindy sitting with Mike in the bar... Later he will assume maybe there was some connection with Cindy and Mike and will hunt her down... only to come to the realization that Cindy was almost a victim aswell...
OK I gotta jet... Read this shit over... Thanks guys! We will definatly adding in the other scenes that other folks have writted as we get to where we think they should go in... Though I think tantrums bar scene might have to get injected into what we just wrote if everyone likes it... |
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