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Evolution Myths         8612 reads

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4/21/2006 at 03:06
I just watched that infuriating Kirk Cameron shitheap, interviewing people on the street as though they could disprove evolution by talking to the average idiot.
Guess what Kirk, the average Christian doesn't read the Bible. I bet if I asked the average Christian off the street, in my rad selectively edited interview, if it says in the Bible that Jesus was born in a manger on the 25th of December, they would say that he was.

But I got more and more pissed. Not only do the religious zealots not have a motherfucking clue what constitutes modern evolutionary theory, neither does the average human being.
This is partly because science is frustratingly dumbed-down, so the average person just doesn't know better. Shit, I took a class on it, and some shit I thought wasn't all that intelligent in retrospect.

There is a lot of silly misinformation out there, so I thought I would summarize a few points of contention.






--WE DID NOT "EVOLVE FROM MONKEYS"

More likely, we evolved from a common ancestor. This is an appeal to emotion from religious types. WE ARE BETTER THAN MONKEYS, LOL. Well, we share approx. 99.9% of our DNA with chimpanzees, bonobo monkeys masturbate and have sex for pleasure, and they've taught qwerty how to type. However this does distract from the real point, that we're similar in many aspects, but that it's an argument designed to distract from factual information.


--EVOLUTION IS NOT GOING "FORWARD"

It's not fucking going anywhere. We are not the pinnacle. That picture, where the monkey is hunched over, and gradually turns into a human?
FORGET IT. (Interestingly enough, that pic was entitled "The End of Evolution," which is impossible. Evolution never ends goddammit) Things do not get "more complex" necessarily. They adopt better strategies. That is to say, sharks are more evolutionarily successful than we are, because they have been around for a lot longer. Human cognition is an evolutionarily successful strategy.

Corrolary: GENES DON'T "WANT" ANYTHING. My genes drive me to mate with an attractive woman, to have children, to survive, to eat food. But my genes are not little people with motives. Genes are neither good nor bad, they simply exist in me and express themselves in a number of ways.


--EVOLUTION TAKES (SCIENTIFICALLY SPEAKING) A "LONG MOTHERFUCKING TIME"

We have had agricultural society for approx. 10,000 years. We have had industrial society for a few hundred. Before that, it took us millions of years to get to where we are. One million years is so large that you or I cannot properly conceptualize that number. I know that we hear that word all the time, but think about it this way: one million years means (assuming 50 years per generation, which is not necessarily likely) 20,000 generations. It took us about 5 million years to evolve from our earliest human ancestors, which is about 100,000 generations. How far back does your family tree go?




--WE CAN TRACE PEOPLE AROUND THE WORLD BACK TO A HANDFUL OF ANCESTORS

Through mitochondrial DNA. Yes, we have been able to figure out that from Europe to America to Africa, we all have approx. 7 female ancestors that birthed us somewhere in Europe (we know that from the way the mitochondrial DNA is spread out over the world).
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If Christians want to execute criminals based on "infallible" DNA evidence, then they might as well believe this too.


--EVOLUTION DOESN'T HAVE THAT MUCH PROOF/ THERE ARE "HOLES" IN THE FOSSIL RECORD / THERE IS NO EVIDENCE OF "TRANSITIONAL SPECIES"

Evolution is one of the most vetted and agreed-upon theories. Theory in the scientific sense, which means it has moved past the hypothesis stage. Scientists can't agree on what constitutes "cognition" or "emotion" or "physics," but we don't see gravity failing magically. Isn't it a wonder that the most agreed-upon theories are generally correct? I don't see any Bible-thumpers arguing quantum physics (GOD CREATED EVERYTHING, STOP TRYING TO EXPLAIN IT).

Likewise, there are no "holes" in the fossil record. The fossil record we have is miraculous. Do you realize how unlikely it is to find a fossil? Dead animals are usually eaten. Bones are usually scattered. Old bones are often brittle. To find intact skeletons is rare. That being said, we have a fucking shitload of them. We have proof coming out the asshole.

And we do have transitional species, but it's easy to argue that away. Let's say we find species 1 and species 3. Foaming at the mouth, they ask, "Where's species 2, the transitional one?!" One day we find 2. Suddenly the question becomes, "Where is 1.5 and 2.5?!" Two new holes to fill! The fact is, we have examples of human evolution such as Lucy. We have species such as sharks and cockroaches that have survived millions of years and that still fucking exist. We can literally trace some steps of evolution.

But that is not enough.




What likely happened (HOW DARE I SAY "LIKELY") was that amino acids grouped together, then, like viruses, some were able to form "lifeless" organisms. That happened because one probably pulled another amino acid chain around it, forming a shell. Cells joined together and formed different aspects resembling an ancestor of a modern cell. We see this in cells today, that there are mitochondria that actually appear to be separate life forms living inside cells. These groups became complex to the point of "eating" each other (taking apart to use their amino acid chains).

Eventually, over possibly BILLIONS of years, we got unicellular organisms as we know them today. Unicellular organisms got more complex, they became multi-cellular, and at some point (probably BILLIONS OF YEARS LATER) became something fish-like. Eyes probably started as groups of photo-sesitive cells grouping together. Digestion probably started as enzymatic cells that broke down amino acids. Movement started as a way to retrieve food. Reproduction is a way to ensure the survival of some of your own genes, and probably started as "gene trading" where you got some new genes that you might be able to "use" to better your chances of surviving.










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4/21/2006 at 03:24

I still piss and shit outside when I have a chance but I try to stay away from the bananas and jerking off in public. though I do like to whiz on my friends when possible.






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4/21/2006 at 03:38

But, does anyone care about cold hard facts when you can believe in the warm fuzzy glow of the enternal god licking your perineum for the rest of your consciousness?

That's the motivation, it is a reptillian characteristic of mammals to persue the maternal bonding-lick so prevelant in our genus, perhaps our phylum!

We have merely replaced that reassuring lovingly given and recieved demurrment from our mother with an ebbulent artificial memory invoked at will by the right "state of grace". Which if you read into it, is a post/pre-orgasmic state of purity and non-fart-stinkiness.

It's the lies that make you feel good.

Can you tell me how that's going to make any sort of difference to the rate of spin of a cesium attom or a self-replicating polypeptide?~?!

Conversely, how will the science, fact, truth, reality, causal obviousness, {and other strong words meaning that you would be stupid to not notice it}, affect an emotional attachment to irrational pleasure?

They can't do it. No thought, or observation will alter their reptillian draw to pleasure of eating, fucking, or the precursor to all these states: feeling safe. Stupid feels safe. Safe is quiet and free of doubt. Safe has no challenges, goals or obstacles.

Safe is happy and good.

Your attempt here is a great start at attempting to disrupt the safety and it's subesquent narcoleptic stupor, but you are really just upset that you are upset about something so obvious.

I suggest trying to find not a sudden or obvious contradiction to their belief system, but something less drastic. On a biological level, systems never really appreciate SHOCK!, but they do respond favorably to moderate and subtle environmental pressures which cause a gradual transition amoungst competencies.

You see, each individual contains a tool box--this box is multi-faceted and able to do just about everything. However, it would be impractical from a resources perspective to fully develop and elaborate each available function; simply put, Superman is too expensive to create. As such, the competencies and tools are selected amoungst a cast of available circumstances. One of these well-developed tools is your focus.

What circumstance brings about the religious? That is your obstacle, not the details of a sqwabble they have with a boundary of thiers, namely: intellect.






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4/21/2006 at 04:09

You put a lot of effort into that. Bravo.






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dont give a shit


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4/21/2006 at 04:19

I got another dumb question anti-evolutionist ask, that I've encountered frequently, from rather intelligent people:

"If I leave fish in a barrel, why don't they evolve into something else?"
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4/21/2006 at 04:39

Mofo: I got another dumb question anti-evolutionist ask, that I've encountered frequently, from rather intelligent people:

"If I leave fish in a barrel, why don't they evolve into something else?"


Because the enviroment doesnt change.






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It's insane, this guy's taint


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4/21/2006 at 06:13

Mofo: I got another dumb question anti-evolutionist ask, that I've encountered frequently, from rather intelligent people:

"If I leave fish in a barrel, why don't they evolve into something else?"


Because the enviroment doesnt change.


Tru dat. Evolution happens in changing environments -- or with mutations that are adaptive. Plus, see my point RE: EVOLUTION TAKES A FUCKING LONG TIME. You can't SEE macroevolution, you just can't. You would have to wait easily thousands of years before you could see truly measurable changes, in most cases. It's really a horribly flawed argument.
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4/21/2006 at 12:39

I work with a guy who believes the Whole Noahs Ark thing really happened about 5000 years ago.






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4/21/2006 at 13:13

HOBO: I work with a guy who believes the Whole Noahs Ark thing really happened about 5000 years ago.


What a dumbass. It was more like 8000 years ago.






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4/21/2006 at 13:20

This may be one of the greatest threads in LS history

I've faced this very debate on a state-wide level (Kansas). Having been raised in a very conservative protestant church, I was once a believer in creationism. I never really refuted evolution, just ignored it. One day, in my early teens, I became self aware and realized how biology > theology and quit going to church.

During my final months in the church, I started to confront some of the youth leaders and peers on the almost weekly discussion of evolution. Just like Phil and Nocal mention, the refutations consisted mainly of "IF WE EVOLVED FROM MONKEYS, HOW COME THARS STILL MONKEYS?!". I even recieved literature that would dance around scientific discussion and pepper-spray the reader with scripture in an attempt to provide answers. This was really the straw that broke my spiritual back - Mass Ignorance.

My personal stance has become one of privilege. I feel fortunate that I have both the brainpower and the inhibition to understand the truth that evolution holds. I quit trying to change the world a long time ago because all you end up doing is offending people, which only strengthens their resolve to be stupid.

Evolution out of necessity, diversity out of the same.

I do somewhat subscribe to the intelligent design notion of evolution.The processes and context in which life began and got to where it is today is a truly amazing thing. The human genome has reached a point of such efficient regulation and activity that there must be something we will never truly understand guiding it. Mother Nature? God? Chaos? THE SPIRIT OF TRUTH? I don't know and probably never will.






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4/21/2006 at 14:13

Wow.

I can't understand how all of you can sit there and try to defend evolution when it's a fact that the earth and everything in it was created by the hand of God in 7 days and that the earth is ONLY about 6000 years old.

I'm fuking kidding.


Seriously though, I have for some time now felt that organized religion is a nothing more than a crutch for a weak mind. My Mom is one of those "Bible Thumpers". She completely buys into this line of drivel and has tried on more than one occasion to convince me. I have found that it is impossible to argue against this when the opposing arguement is "blind faith". You don't have to explain it, you just have to believe.

Religious zealots are alot like a rottweiler humping your leg. It's usually best to avoid the situation but if backed into a corner you should just let them finish since fighting will turn ugly real fast.

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4/21/2006 at 14:23

Metatron:
I do somewhat subscribe to the intelligent design notion of evolution.The processes and context in which life began and got to where it is today is a truly amazing thing. The human genome has reached a point of such efficient regulation and activity that there must be something we will never truly understand guiding it. Mother Nature? God? Chaos? THE SPIRIT OF TRUTH? I don't know and probably never will.


Now I can't respect people that say, "Just look at how COMPLEX everything is! It must be JESUS MAGIC! [which is just an appeal to ignorance]", but I can respect where you're coming from.

I actually don't think that evolution and religion need to be separate. I don't see any contradiction in believing that God facilitates evolution. For all I know, he is sitting in a big chair, directing every step of it. BUT that doesn't mean that evolution isn't happening.

However I sometimes have a problem with people that argue this "Intelligent Design" point. Reason being is: we're complex, sure. But to believe someone / something intelligent designed us?

Example: religious types will say, "Look at the human eye! It's so complex!" Which is sort of true, it's pretty complex. However, our eyes have a blind spot, and our field of vision overlaps considerably in order to functionally eliminate it. Not very intelligent, lord!

Of course, like I said, I can't argue that there is no God, and I certainly am able to respect that particular opinion.
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4/21/2006 at 14:33

Now I can't respect people that say, "Just look at how COMPLEX everything is! It must be JESUS MAGIC! [which is just an appeal to ignorance]", but I can respect where you're coming from.

I actually don't think that evolution and religion need to be separate. I don't see any contradiction in believing that God facilitates evolution. For all I know, he is sitting in a big chair, directing every step of it. BUT that doesn't mean that evolution isn't happening.

However I sometimes have a problem with people that argue this "Intelligent Design" point. Reason being is: we're complex, sure. But to believe someone / something intelligent designed us?

Example: religious types will say, "Look at the human eye! It's so complex!" Which is sort of true, it's pretty complex. However, our eyes have a blind spot, and our field of vision overlaps considerably in order to functionally eliminate it. Not very intelligent, lord!

Of course, like I said, I can't argue that there is no God, and I certainly am able to respect that particular opinion.


Please don't mistake me explaining the wonders of existence as a virtuous gift from the big guy in the sky. I too have grappled with the "line" between creationism and intelligent design. Let me clarify.

I see "god" as nature, really. Call it a mnemonic. A word used to capture our quantum existence. We should get high and talk about this, it'd be easier






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4/21/2006 at 17:35

I love when someone starts a thread like this.

The original rant, professionaled up a bit, could be a good Megarad article.



HOBO: I work with a guy who believes the Whole Noahs Ark thing really happened about 5000 years ago.

Another guy you and tank and loki know spent 45 minutes in a bar about a month ago explaining that since I run a website, it was very, very important that I keep my eyes open and not let my skepticism unfairly discount any potential signs of The Apocalypse I might see, because I had a responsibility to get the word out if indeed The End Times were upon us.

Kahuna was there and can attest I am not bullshitting anyone. I half-suspect the dude was bullshitting me in a super stealth manner, because he's a cool guy and not a holy roller as far as I've ever been able to tell.






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4/21/2006 at 17:51

No disrespect intended Vas, but if I were hoping to get the alert that the end times were here, LinkSwarm would be the last place I'd look.

From some of the things I have seen here, the end times have already struck.






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4/21/2006 at 17:58

vasudeva: I love when someone starts a thread like this.

The original rant, professionaled up a bit, could be a good Megarad article.



HOBO: I work with a guy who believes the Whole Noahs Ark thing really happened about 5000 years ago.

Another guy you and tank and loki know spent 45 minutes in a bar about a month ago explaining that since I run a website, it was very, very important that I keep my eyes open and not let my skepticism unfairly discount any potential signs of The Apocalypse I might see, because I had a responsibility to get the word out if indeed The End Times were upon us.

Kahuna was there and can attest I am not bullshitting anyone. I half-suspect the dude was bullshitting me in a super stealth manner, because he's a cool guy and not a holy roller as far as I've ever been able to tell.




yeah, whatever.....but what signs have your eyes seen? TELL US!!






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4/21/2006 at 18:52

excellent post, nocal.

nocal: We are not the pinnacle. That picture, where the monkey is hunched over, and gradually turns into a human? FORGET IT.

have you read 'ishmael' by daniel quinn? it's an awesome book. one of the points he makes (and i can't remember the exact organism) is that if you asked any organism the 'story of the world' it would be tailored to how its kind originated and advanced and then ends with its current state of existence. you'd get to a point where it would say 'and that's how we ocelots came to be in the modern era'. you'd ask 'and then what?' and it wouldn't really have an answer except for 'and then we do more stuff'. the problem is that humans have the capacity to reason beyond this and we just. fucking. don't. instead, people read the bible that tells us the universe was created just so humans could exist.

nocal: sharks are more evolutionarily successful than we are, because they have been around for a lot longer.

and virtually unchanged, i might add. super-efficient killing machines.

wolfer:
Mofo: I got another dumb question anti-evolutionist ask, that I've encountered frequently, from rather intelligent people:

"If I leave fish in a barrel, why don't they evolve into something else?"

Because the enviroment doesnt change.

[nitpick mode] not exactly. fish in a barrel, if left there for thousands of years, would eventually evolve (or die, lol). this is due to the fact that that fish's ancestors did not evolve into their present form in a barrel. for an example, think of cave fish that no longer see. there have been some notable examples of sudden changes, but it seems that the majority of evolutionary changes are only observable well after the fact. this fish barrel argument is totally stupid to me primarily because this is what we've been doing to plants and animals for a long time now. see: maize, numerous dog breeds.

metatron: I see "god" as nature, really. Call it a mnemonic. A word used to capture our quantum existence. We should get high and talk about this, it'd be easier.

word. i've always thought of things this way: if everything progresses toward entropy, then how is anything possible? if anything, i like to think of it as the spark of order in chaos (unwotakified, of course). i think the eastern religions are interesting as they are far ahead of western religion with respect to this paradox.

vasudeva: I love when someone starts a thread like this.

double word.






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4/21/2006 at 19:22

I don't think anyone here, or anywhere else on earth can do anything more than take wild stabs at how life works.






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4/21/2006 at 20:02

dent: I don't think anyone here, or anywhere else on earth can do anything more than take wild stabs at how life works.


But that damn sure won't stop us from trying.






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4/21/2006 at 20:52

Some of the stuff in this thread reminds me of
The Lucifer Principle and
This Amazing Book








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4/21/2006 at 21:39

Everything was meant to be misunderstood.
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4/22/2006 at 02:35

there have been some notable examples of sudden changes,


Bah, there's something I should have thought of in the original post.

While most of us think of evolution as this constant evolutionary pressure that exerts itself over the course of thousands or millions or billions of years, resulting in slow, gradual changes, that might not be the case. Or at least, that might not be the case all the time.

Punctuated equilibrium is the idea that things are fine for a while, then punctuated by a sudden change. So, say the clam is sitting at the ocean floor for 10,000 years with no change. One day BAM, a new foreign predator. Perhaps in 1,000 years (short, relatively speaking) it develops a defense.

have you read 'ishmael' by daniel quinn?


No, but from the rest of your post, I should check it out, because you pretty much said exactly what I was trying to get across. Whenever you say "progression," we understand it to mean going somewhere with some goal. It isn't the case with evolution.

Please don't mistake me explaining the wonders of existence as a virtuous gift from the big guy in the sky. I too have grappled with the "line" between creationism and intelligent design.


I understand that point of view, and while I don't necessarily agree, I definitely can't argue it. So I guess I'm saying something to the effect of "agree to disagree," only trying to be less flippant about it. My dad feels the same way, and he's a smart guy.

I see "god" as nature, really.


Or, like my friend Jakob might say: God is the universe -- a self-replicating, fractal being, gaining ever more information about the nature of his own existence. That is, by far, the best version of "God" I have ever heard (and Crackalackin seemed to agree).

if everything progresses toward entropy, then how is anything possible?


There was some link on here not that long ago, can't recall what exactly it was and I'm definitely struggling to try and paraphrase here, so don't necessarily trust what comes next in this paragraph. Wasn't there a recent experiment where they found that the more variance they put into a system, the closer it got to reaching order? And the more order they introduced, the more it swung back into chaos? That, to me, suggests that the universe is so very disordered as to facilitate order. Counter intuitive, I know, but if that experiment could be generalized, then I like the idea. Then again, I don't necessarily believe that the universe is ordered, but that we see order where none may exist (see: pareidolia).

I don't think anyone here, or anywhere else on earth can do anything more than take wild stabs at how life works.


You actually touched on the main reason there is valid skepticism within the scientific community regarding evolutionary theory: in many cases, it is not empirical. Science prides itself on empiricism, the ability to see and measure and record and test. But how do we test evolution? We can't. Microevolution, certainly. Macroevolution...well, we wouldn't be having this internet debate against Kirk Cameron's bullshit pussy if we could empirically prove this shit. Ok, maybe we would anyway. But at least there would be no need to worry about people believing what KIRK CAMERON says.
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4/22/2006 at 03:39

Pandas and People - A Brief Critique is worth a read. Creationists seem to gobble this shit up.






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4/22/2006 at 03:54

Pandas and People - A Brief Critique is worth a read.


From the article:
If all organisms are intelligently designed, what are the forces that seem always to intervene and drive these organisms to extinction?


YES. I love that point, and will probably use it one day in the future. It's similar to my "blind spot" point: if that desinger is so "intelligent," why does s/he (or it) make basic mistakes?
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4/22/2006 at 05:18

Nocal, the more I read your threads/posts, the more you impress me.






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4/22/2006 at 06:27

dent: Nocal, the more I read your threads/posts, the more you impress me.


You guys....need a moment?
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4/22/2006 at 06:29

nocal:
mundhra: have you read 'ishmael' by daniel quinn?


No, but from the rest of your post, I should check it out, because you pretty much said exactly what I was trying to get across.

please do, i'd like to hear others' thoughts on it.

i know a couple people that were blown away by it, but to be truthful, it just collects a lot of stuff i already thought. an excellent read, nonetheless. there are follow-ups as well (which i haven't yet read).






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4/22/2006 at 06:56

metatron: I see "god" as nature, really. Call it a mnemonic. A word used to capture our quantum existence. We should get high and talk about this, it'd be easier.


word. i've always thought of things this way: if everything progresses toward entropy, then how is anything possible? if anything, i like to think of it as the spark of order in chaos (unwotakified, of course). i think the eastern religions are interesting as they are far ahead of western religion with respect to this paradox.


Exactly. You guys are great.

When it comes down to it, I believe in something that aproaches intelligent design, but intelligent design itself is bullshit. Its just a means to justify the undercutting of evolution which, as already mentioned, is as accepted science as just about anything.

There was some link on here not that long ago, can't recall what exactly it was and I'm definitely struggling to try and paraphrase here, so don't necessarily trust what comes next in this paragraph. Wasn't there a recent experiment where they found that the more variance they put into a system, the closer it got to reaching order? And the more order they introduced, the more it swung back into chaos? That, to me, suggests that the universe is so very disordered as to facilitate order. Counter intuitive, I know, but if that experiment could be generalized, then I like the idea.


I think you just broke my head. I'll get back to this tomorrow.






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dont give a shit


SSHOLE

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4/22/2006 at 07:08

Nocal:
According to a computational study conducted by a group of physicists at Washington University in St. Louis, one may create order by introducing disorder.

While working on their model — a network of interconnected pendulums, or "oscillators" — the researchers noticed that when driven by ordered forces the various pendulums behaved chaotically and swung out of sync like a group of intoxicated synchronized swimmers. This was unexpected — shouldn't synchronized forces yield synchronized pendulums?

But then came the real surprise: When they introduced disorder — forces were applied at random to each oscillator — the system became ordered and synchronized.

"The thing that is counterintuitive is that when you introduce disorder into the system — when the [forces on the pendulums] act at random — the chaos that was present before disappears and there is order," said Sebastian F. Brandt, Washington University physics graduate student in Arts & Sciences and lead author of the study, which appeared in the January 2006 edition of Physical Review Letters.


This?
http://news-info.wustl.edu/tips/page/normal/6845.html
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SENATOR BABYHEAD




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4/22/2006 at 10:22

I liked "Ishmael" a lot and think it could do everyone a bit of good to read it. What I got out of it was insight into consumption.. or rather consumption vs. necessity, takers vs leavers.. I really enjoyed the tracing of our 'evolution' from hunter-gatherer subsistence to modern day capitalism..

It was not profound to me personally in the way that Howard Bloom's "The Lucifer Principle" was though. That book turned my entire world upside down! And no, it's not about Satan. It's 'a scientific exploration into the forces of history'...

He's all about shattering what some call "Neo Darwinist Dogma" and does so very eloquently as he is an absolute genius. (imho)

4 A Good Time, Read











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