Tagnut
SENATOR BABYHEAD  Posts: 219 Registered: 11/27/2004 Offline
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1/11/2005 at 01:48 |
"My penis hangs at just 2 inches..............from the ground!"
____________________ STOP STEALING MY OXYGEN ! |
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qwerty
DARTH MENSES  Posts: 628 Registered: 9/8/2004 Offline
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1/11/2005 at 07:31 |
Not really pick-up line more of a technique: Talk to the girl that catches your eye and ask her to dance. If she says no, then hit up her best friend. When the girl see's you dancing with her friend she'll want you bad.
To prove the point: I'm the asshat of the swarm until 4 days ago and now I sure you're all heaps glad to see me back
Steel: My discussion starter: "Ever think about having a one night stand?"
On a side note, I strongly feel women shouldn't get to post their pickup lines as they are irrelevant. DumbSkull of course you saying "Why are you still dressed?" worked.
Any attempt to pickup a guy will work :) Unless you are homely... Then we need some additional enticing... But even then not a lot.
Not always true dude I had 2 fat pigs stalk me for like 6months.
____________________ fnord linkswarm fnord |
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Dumbskull
I'm assuming the position!  SSHOLEPosts: 1891 Registered: 4/22/2004 Offline
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1/11/2005 at 07:49 |
When did you leave? Where did you go? No one noticed!
____________________ Easier to get into than a community college. |
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Ginjin
Tender vittles  Posts: 7 Registered: 5/16/2004 Offline
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1/11/2005 at 08:13 |
These pick up lines with responses are for men or lesbians....
Man: Haven't I seen you someplace before?
>> Woman: Yes, that's why I don't go there anymore. Man: Really? I
>> heard it was because everyone there calls you a fat slut.
>>
>>
>> Man: Is this seat empty?
>> Woman: Yes, and this one will be if you sit down. Man: There's no
>> need to get on your knees and suck me off just yet.
>>
>>
>> Man: Your place or mine?
>> Woman: Both. You go to yours, and I'll go to mine. Man: That's
>> cool, cause after I'm done shagging you in the back of my car, I
>> don't give a shit where you go.
>>
>>
>> Man: So, what do you do for a living?
>> Woman: I'm a female impersonator.
>> Man: That explains the moustache then!
>>
>>
>> (CLASSIC!!!!)
>> Man: How do you like your eggs in the morning?
>> Woman: Unfertilised. Man: No problem, I'll just shoot my load up
>> your arse.
>>
>>
>> Man: I would go to the end of the world for you.
>> Woman: But would you stay there? Man: Probably, cause you seem
>> like the kind of chick that is impossible to shake off once
>> you've been shagged.
>>
>>
>> Man: Would you like to dance?
>> Woman: I'd rather eat glass. Man: I think you mis-heard me. I
>> said you look fat in those pants
>>
>>
>> Man: Where have you been all my life?
>> Woman: Fortunately, somewhere else. Man: Just as well cos I've
>> been shagging your mum while your dad watches.
>>
>>
>> Man: You're pretty
>> Woman: Piss off. Man: Don't interrupt, You're pretty... ugly, you
>> fat bitch.
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Sachsenpaule
SENATOR BABYHEAD  Posts: 165 Registered: 11/16/2003 Offline
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2/22/2005 at 19:36 |
"You look like somebody who dont need a pick up line."
____________________ And they wile away the hours
In their ivory towers
Till they're covered up with flowers
In the back of a black limousine
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Heather
DARTH MENSES  Posts: 602 Registered: 11/24/2004 Offline
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2/23/2005 at 15:49 |
"Would you suck a dick fer a million dollars?" |
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acheron
Cynical_Malcontent  SSHOLEPosts: 553 Registered: 4/29/2004 Offline
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2/23/2005 at 16:02 |
Nice jugs
____________________ I'm an INTJ. This explains why I'm alternating between silence and judging you. |
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Heather
DARTH MENSES  Posts: 602 Registered: 11/24/2004 Offline
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2/23/2005 at 16:22 |
Thanks I borrowed them from LK. He's got jug aplenty. |
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HellKat
SENATOR BABYHEAD  Posts: 176 Registered: 1/19/2005 Offline
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2/24/2005 at 02:40  |
My sister and I used to go out and troll for tail. We are nine years apart in age, but at the time, we had been accused of being twins. She taught me everything I know. How to pinch butts and get away with it... told me the difference between a vibrater and a dildo....everything I needed to know that momma didn't tell me. Often though, Sarah and I could not even get a guy to dance with either of us. We would pick a victim that did not look too stuck on himself and...well...ask him if he would dance. We scared most of them away. The ones we did not scare away, we then would heckle the guy for saying "no" with such statements as "dancing is not a spectator sport yanno....." or "why not, do you think you are something too special for one of us?" We would get the rest of the gals in the vicinity to get on his case. I guess the bottom line is I never had a line. Now I don't need one, just the right look. Took me 20 years to figure that out. I guess I am a slow learner.
____________________ am I ignorant or apathetic? don't know, don't care..... |
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slippedhole
SENATOR BABYHEAD  Posts: 234 Registered: 4/24/2004 Offline
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2/24/2005 at 04:52 |

"Be afraid, be very afraid"
____________________ Realize that the "goal" of all members here is to relieve their fear of DEATH through ritualistic sacrifieses of non-agreeable members. They focus on inflicting pain and hatred on others so they don't feel it for themselves. And behind everything they do |
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Heather
DARTH MENSES  Posts: 602 Registered: 11/24/2004 Offline
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2/24/2005 at 14:47 |
HellKat, your sister's older then?
I have never seen a man say no to an invitation to cut a rug on the dancefloor. Were you at a gay club? |
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HellKat
SENATOR BABYHEAD  Posts: 176 Registered: 1/19/2005 Offline
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2/24/2005 at 15:13 |
My sister is 9 years younger. Unfortunately our age difference is obvious now. Yea, when we tried to go dancing we had to dance with ourselves most of the time. We were usually at rock-n-roll type clubs (straight!), we also ventured into the C&W scene a couple of times but could never get more action than a line dance. I even learned how to do the basic double two step, push and swing. No fun to dance those with your sister! We had to draw the line somewhere.
____________________ am I ignorant or apathetic? don't know, don't care..... |
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Heather
DARTH MENSES  Posts: 602 Registered: 11/24/2004 Offline
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2/24/2005 at 15:34 |
C&W bars, now that I can understand. Those cowpokes can be pretty snobby about who they dance with. |
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BeachGoat
DARTH MENSES  Posts: 431 Registered: 10/31/2003 Offline
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2/24/2005 at 16:05 |
"Hey, I Smell Pussy!.......*sniffs fingers*......oh, wait, that's me."
Tommy Chong in person, talking to my wife as he signed her t-shirt.
____________________
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middle_age_man
Mostly Harmless  SSHOLEPosts: 427 Registered: 1/11/2005 Offline
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2/24/2005 at 21:21 |
I found that if I walked up to a girl and casually licked my eyebrows I didn't need any pickup lines. |
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ghostrider
liberal exit  SSHOLEPosts: 2410 Registered: 7/29/2004 Offline
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2/25/2005 at 00:20 |
The best bar pick up line I've ever used was "I'd lick your pussy before I fucked it"
werked like a charm
____________________ i feed my dog (Magic Man) Kraft Singles cheese slices for a week.one slice over each of his food dishes a day. then i take him backyard and place a cheese slice over his shit piles.he consumes the cheese and waste. ~tantrum |
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McGoatCheese
SIR BABYHEAD  Posts: 79 Registered: 7/22/2002 Offline
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2/25/2005 at 03:27 |
friend of mine liked to go to club, pick out girls at random and motion at them to come over his way. as they were walking towards him he'd slip off his sandle and start having an intent conversation into it. as the girl reached him he'd hand them his sandle saying "it's for you". that usually got a laugh then and more later. |
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Heather
DARTH MENSES  Posts: 602 Registered: 11/24/2004 Offline
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2/25/2005 at 16:29 |
So you're friend is single then? I can not imagine a favorable outcome to a male handing me his smelly shoe.
Where you been, Mcgoat? |
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RoozleRose
Tender vittles  Posts: 48 Registered: 1/11/2005 Offline
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2/27/2005 at 19:28 |
Many years ago, I was sitting in my neighborhood pub watching this gorgeous hunky guy play pool. When the game ended, he came over by where I was sitting and ordered a beer. For lack of anything more creative to say, I got out a cigarette (I still smoked tobacco then) and said "Do you have a light?" He gazed into my eyes, gave me a slow, sexy smile, and replied "I AM the light...what you seek is the flame", and then flicked his bic. I was instantly smitten, and from that moment on we were together until parted by his tragic and untimely death. And it was true - not just some bullshit pickup line! Still the best one I ever heard, though.
____________________ Life is a garden.....Dig it! |
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