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Sex Injuries         3655 reads

Slipping it into the wrong hole any chance I get


SSHOLE


Posts: 857
Registered: 10/20/2004
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1/6/2005 at 20:08
This is awesome.

This is the first pornsite I've found in years that I'd actually advertise to swarmers. When you first load it up, it looks just like every crappy scam site out there, except that it's real. It's huge, it's updated constantly, there's no spam, no popups, and no bullshit -- and it's completely free. When you sign up through that link above and respond to the confirmation email, I make a bit of loose change.

See what other swarmers have to say about it. People love this place, so I feel fine about sending you there and am confident you will enjoy boners.

The thread below is what brought you here, but chances are by now the images are broken, the passwords don't work, and you can't get shit to load. You're welcome to try, of course, but This is your best bet.



Don't forget to respond to the confirmation email , or you won't get in, so check your spam filter, pervert.



This message is only shown to anonymous peeps coming in from other websites looking for porn. Registered users are not shown any ads here.

Now, on to the original post...
Since I havnt created a topic in a while, HERE IT IS BITCHES!

Please post only about injuries you have recieved from some phuked up sex you have had. No bite marks, hickies, scratch marks (unless needed stitches), none of that gay shit. I'll start...


I am under this female. Female above me is having a glorious time bouncing like a pogo stick. This dumbfuck bounces a bit too high and displaces the cock. Dumbfuck lands fractions of a second later on cock. Hole was not there. Cock bends in half. I scream. Blood pours from pee-hole. Dumbfuck tries to land correctly but falls off bed and takes off the nightstand drawer knob with face. Bad night.

I didn't go to the hospital because the blood slowed down once I calmed down. I had a bloodblister for the rest of our relationship on my junk.






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"You must have weak asslips. I like to sculpt mine on the way out, like table legs under a lathe" - Vasudeva

 
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I'm assuming the position!


SSHOLE

Posts: 1901
Registered: 4/22/2004
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1/6/2005 at 20:18

All I can recall of my past when I was a serious mattress monster was some bad ass rug burns on my knees and ass. And maybe a few bruises on my pelvic bones cuz I was real skinny. But other than that... all I got was the usual nuttin.






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Easier to get into than a community college.
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SIR BABYHEAD




Posts: 86
Registered: 1/1/2005
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1/6/2005 at 20:29

All I can say is don't ever try to face fuck an angry pit bull.
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DARTH MENSES




Posts: 919
Registered: 4/23/2004
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1/6/2005 at 20:30

zapple: All I can say is don't ever try to face fuck an angry pit bull.

Werd.






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bwned.
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Bad Taste in your Mouth


SSHOLE

Posts: 4459
Registered: 3/8/2002
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1/6/2005 at 21:14

I am under this female. Female above me is having a glorious time bouncing like a pogo stick. This dumbfuck bounces a bit too high and displaces the cock. Dumbfuck lands fractions of a second later on cock. Hole was not there. Cock bends in half. I scream.
Ditto.


Blood pours from pee-hole. Dumbfuck tries to land correctly but falls off bed and takes off the nightstand drawer knob with face. Bad night. I didn't go to the hospital because the blood slowed down once I calmed down. I had a bloodblister for the rest of our relationship on my junk.
Thank god, no ditto.

P.S. For the entire length of your post, every time you typed "dumbfuck" I read it as "DumbSkull". Very unnerving.






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slippedhole> I am on to you and your evil intentions. I am the true protector of this website and am willing to do battle with you.
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I'm assuming the position!


SSHOLE

Posts: 1901
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1/6/2005 at 21:19








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Easier to get into than a community college.
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DARTH MENSES




Posts: 612
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1/6/2005 at 21:45

Never hurt anything but my pride.
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DARTH MENSES




Posts: 919
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1/6/2005 at 22:11

Heather: Never hurt anything but my pride.


Is that a euphimism?






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DARTH MENSES




Posts: 612
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1/6/2005 at 22:28

Not unless you think I'm clandestinely referring to my penis.
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Tender vittles




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1/6/2005 at 22:42

i got carpal tunnel one time






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yes fucking.
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Cynical_Malcontent


SSHOLE

Posts: 559
Registered: 4/29/2004
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1/7/2005 at 02:24

Thank god, no ditto.

P.S. For the entire length of your post, every time you typed "dumbfuck" I read it as "DumbSkull". Very unnerving.


Same here.

I had something similiar happen lately. Couldn't have sex for a week. No fun.

HI WORLD I FUKED UP MY QUOTE TAGS LOL POUND ME IN THE ASS

[Edited on 1/7/2005 by vasudeva]






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Too old to Rock and Roll...too young to die


SSHOLE

Posts: 756
Registered: 8/19/2004
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1/7/2005 at 02:30

WTF happened to your post, Acheron? You broke the Swarm.






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The Grumpiest Alpha

To surrender to ignorance and call it God has always been premature, and it remains premature today. - Isaac Asimov
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Zombie scream style


SSHOLE

Posts: 672
Registered: 2/7/2004
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1/7/2005 at 03:18

This forum needs a admin adjustment. STAT!!1






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I love the sound of silence. It gives me something else to break.
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We are not amused.


SSHOLE

Posts: 663
Registered: 9/4/2004
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1/7/2005 at 03:23

I am to the left of center, just like my politics.






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Interjections show excitement or emotion. They're generally set apart from a sentence by an exclamation point, or by a comma when the feeling's not as strong.
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