Turn Your Cheap Steak Into A Prime Cut

Make cheap meep rubbery steaks juicy and tender

Decider: Admin

  • vasudeva
  • Sep12 '07

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This is like food porn. I had the awesomest porterhouse ever this weekend and now I want to burrow through a couple more pounds of cow.

  • mundhra
  • Sep12 '07

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this makes me want to NOM with reckless abandon.

Can you make cheap meat juicy? Yes.

Can you make cheap meat tender? Yes.

Can you make cheap meat taste like Strip or Tenderloin? FUK NO.

Porterhouse is the king of steaks (Strip on one side of the bone, Tenderloin on the other), and probably not the best cut to choose for this experiment.

I may eat mostly vegetarian, but man, those pictures made my mouth water something fierce.

  • vasudeva
  • Sep12 '07

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Time to scrape that meep outta your body and stroll on down to muscle-eatin' land, my man.

  • DeJeR
  • Sep12 '07

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buying a huge cheap steak tonight to try this...

I always take whatever I`m gonna be grilling and throw them inside a big ziplock freezer bag.Pour in whatever you want to marinate it with and let it sit in the fridge for two or three days before grilling.

You can get about 15 chicken thighs for about $5.Try marinating those in some Kikkoman Terayaki for a couple days in the fridge.Cook them mostly with the skin-side down towards the fire.When the skin gets blackenedcrispy,just take a fork and peel the skin off to reveal beautiful,juicy chicken thighs.

meep,now I have to go get me some beers and something to throw on the grill.

  • SexNinja
  • Sep12 '07

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Article is very marf in writing quality but I'll still try it I bet.

Clavis is also largely correct.

  • Wotak
  • Sep12 '07

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I have heard that Ben Hogan cooked steaks in a similar fashion and that those who sampled; made love to the fork involved.

I'm doing this on Saturday night to a handful of cow.

I tried this and it seemed like it worked for the 'managers special' hunk of meat I had, but it was really salty. I plan on trying it again but washing it off much better and not putting on extra steak spices before I try it.

  • Stump
  • Sep12 '07

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Along the same lines as her explanation of the salt breaking down the proteins anything acidic will do the same. It's just a matter of finding the right flavor and not over marinating. Balsamic vinegar, red wine, soy sauce....they all work really well on steaks. Marinating for a day or two in a good beer will attain meat juiciness - you could do it with bourbon, but who wants to waste Jack?

When I first ran across this I was amazed that people didn't know how to cook steak worth a meep.

YES! MARINATE THAT meep! no, you don't need 48-72 hours to do it, unless you are lazy or can't eat it right now but know it's going to spoil if you don't do something with it... that works in a pinch.

Salt is only one option, I say it's missionary style with a teenage virgin--if you want hot donkey meep with a porn star you use a real marinade. As for beer, it's a meep from a hooker--it works in a pinch, but if you drink good beer don't go meeping up the meat with it.

Tips and tricks: Moisture is teh enema! avoid watery BOILED meats. If you have ever had a tough steak it's because it has been exposed to too much WATER. it is the devil.

Salts and denaturation of proteins is the shizzle as the neophyte cookery lady says, but a salt coating is what you do in Cherokee winters with your Buffalo.

Say hello to ACIDS! like Stimpy says, Lemon, Lime, Vinegar, apple cider, basalmic, rice wine--these will do the tricks but must be balanced out with OILS!! Olive, sesame, etc.

If you want a quick marinade: ITALIAN DRESSING. it's got it all, and use a basalmic one to make it extra good. Marinate for around 30 minutes at least.

Pro Tip from Steak Mastery Monastery: Thai Fish Sauce + Hoisin + Hot Dumpling sauce [Wei Chan] on Rib Eyes.

Oh and for godsakes use the natural wood charcoal.

Maybe this is better as a forum item. but meep datatyping nazis. go to meep

I vote the Spencer steak as the choicest piece of the cow. No bones and just the right amount of fat so you don't need to meep up the flavour of the meat with marinade.

  • Wrecker
  • Sep13 '07

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I did this last night.

And for the record, if you have good steak, such as a Porterhouse, and you marinate it, you should be flayed. Good steak requires little or no additions aside from a little fire.

Don't know the cut, and don't really care. For reference we will call it 'Steak from BJs' (the store, meephats).

I had eaten some of this steak previously and it was pretty awful. Not tough, but it just had no flavor at all.

So yesterday when I got home, I took the rest of the steak and buried that meep in salt and let it sit for an hour.

I washed all the salt off really well and dried the meep out of it. Then I added just a little bit of ground pepper. Cooked on the grill for exactly seven minutes flipped once and cooked for exactly another seven minutes. The meat was rare-medium, just the way I like it.

I made some garlic meeper and melted it over the top and had some fried potatoes to go along with.

Now, I cannot sit here and tell you that the steak awesome. But compared to what it had tasted like before? Holy meep, it was like there was a whole world of flavor in there. It definately improved the taste by quite a bit.

I think that you should buy the best cut of steak you can afford and start from there. However, I fully endorse the salt method for cheap steak.

  • DeJeR
  • Sep13 '07

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I had a dream last night that I was explaining to my wife the details of how to properly season a meepty steak. From what I remember it was a pretty meep good explanation too.

Conclusions: a) I'm on linkswarm way too meep often b) I really need a good steak

Dejer: This belongs in the LS in RL forum.

I usually marinate meat in Italian dressing over night. This morning I went out and bought the ugliest chuck roast I could find. I coated it with salt, pepper, garlic, Hungarian hot paprika and ground ginger mix and let it sit at room temp for an hour and a half.

When I picked it up to scrape the salt off the meep thing almost fell apart. I rinsed it, dried it and put it on my new electric grill. It was excellent but the grill could have been hotter. Next time I'll use the old one or the broiler.

It worked better and faster than marinating but doesn't give you the range of options.

  • vasudeva
  • Sep13 '07

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I usually urinate meat.

  • vasudeva
  • Sep16 '07

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azron: When I picked it up to scrape the salt off the meep thing almost fell apart.

I had this same experience last night when I tried this. It reminded me a bit of picking up pizza dough and watching it droop to the counter.

I rinsed well but was still left with a bit of salt flavor, which is fine, because I eat salt like it was water.

The steak seemed oddly greasy after the rinse. Maybe that's normal and I just never handle the steak that much, dunno.

Overall, my mind wasn't blown, but the steak did seem juicier. I think that porterhouse ruined me on mundane steaks though.

  • DeJeR
  • Sep26 '07

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Bought a $3.15/lb chuck steak just to see how well this works. Chopped up some garlic and let it sit for about 30 mins with the salt. Kingof7 and I grilled the steaks and it came out amazing. I had the same experience as Azron with the falling apart-ness, probably because I bought a 3/4' thick steak... Next time I might salt both sides just for good measure.

Now only if there was a way to turn my $5 six-pack into some premium beer (And not the Grain Belt Premium it started as).

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And how could I forget Pepper as she attempts to scare a wild animal. Honey badger doesn't give a meep.~ unlucky
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I bet it's well manicured.
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Try to picture Joan River's meep during the exam. It'll save some embarassment.
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spanky... You Goshdarn two-faced Gemini!
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Don't kid yourself, you'll cry yourself to sleep after the next physical. Happy birthday you middle aged meepgot.
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:
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Home Sweet meeping Home! Ahhhh...
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Let the baby roast rest for an hour, then have your guests help pull the meat. Everyone will have fond memories of the event to cherish FOREVER!
spankerchi+
Just remember to give yourself plenty of time for cooking (a field-dressed baby can weigh upwards of 30 lbs and take a FULL DAY to cook!)
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I prefer free range, breast fed toddler as there's more dense muscle mass.
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Do you keep them penned up like veal and infuse them with formula or mother's milk? I hear formula fed babies have a medicinal taste. I don't want that for the party.... I would be a terrible host.
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No need to leave the skin on. A toddler's got a lot of good marbling.
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I'd go dry rub and smoke it like a picnic meep.
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Ahh. One of those.
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Not to my knowledge. Details please.
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Ugh...too much barbecue pork.
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