• Swarmed by
  • bobacus
  • Aug09 '11
  • 94 things

    6257 rads

The 4 to 8.

Been 20 odd years now that my central nervous system still wakes me up to either mess crank or stand the 0345-0630ish watch topside on the Boatswain's Mate of the Watch roster, running the topside lookout rotation.
It could be some windy meep, no matter where you were, and that same wind would produce waves too, and between them, it might keep a poor lookout's meep awake till the sun came up.
That and my tendency to roam around and meep with my watch teams to keep them honest. They were the eyes, ears, and helm, after all.
I've watched guys come in off lookout into the pilothouse covered in ice crystals.I've pulled them inside the glass enclosure as we all watched the waves break the full meeping length of the main deck to smash vertically and blue over the pilothouse glass,("yep, that was a fish in that water I just saw....good God,....") the height , at which in port ,was around 40 maybe 50 feet from the waters edge, while this big slow gray box of steel bobbed and lumbered up mountains of water in this oscillating, hellish , reluctant way, and the wheel could meeping dog you, wanting to pull you into the trough and roll you over.
I had decided that the gulf of Tehuantepec was a stretch of water named for the Mayan god of Bad Seas and Bad Cookin. We bleached some chicken bones and kept them in a cup by the chart table, so when people came around to ask where we were on the map, we could toss the bones down, scratch our chins, then point to our actual position on the chart.
And the good days on that watch weren't bad. Often some nice cook would bring up homemade cinnamon rolls early, the breeze was warm long before sunrise, and we would be talking meep to keep awake.
"Axe the Boatswains Mate of the Watch do he know what time it is?"
"Dude, my dad was an English teacher. You're going to have to talk so I can understand you." "Man meep you Bob, I want off watch. " " Why, so you can rush off to a whole day of working followed by the watch after work?
meepin stand there, man. You come up late all the time."
"Yeah, but I'm hungry man,......."
"And the ships store stocks meep tons of goodies that you can eat on watch. You ain't got no noodles? You're a bad boy scout ...........
You do remember the Boy Scouts motto, even if you've never participated, surely
(blank stare)........Be Prepared? "
"Man, the only thing I want to be prepared is that meepin omelet I aint eatin right now,........."

Meathead set fire to my toolbox, wandering around dazed out on Ambien yesterday on the 4 to 8. Yesterday was one of those nights that I was able to really sleep.

He would have been terrified of me at that point if he'd been in there, but he found some fake- spice- weed meep to smoke, and likely took his prescribed dose of the sleep aid.
My first thought at the smell of smoke wasn't much, because he was walking around already, and I thought he was frying up bacon, and going off to be productive, as the courts order. Then it was that wrong smell, of scorching vinyl paper, and synthetics, and I was immediately on my feet running into the basement, where I found the kid standing there staring at my still smoking toolbox, looking completely gone.Kid has a history of sleepwalking, and had been walking around.
Is it out? Yes.
Are you hurt? No.
Is anything in the house destroyed? No.
You done doing whatever it was? Yes.
I rode my bicycle 47 miles to burn that incident out of me.

He goes away to jail Tuesday, and I'm really sure its going to be for a long time, but before that, he wants to kill me via heart attack/ stroke, I swear.
He snuck out on court curfew, then back in the front door, which he left unlocked for himself, and when he came in, he was in a mask and top hat , I though it was a home invasion,and had I been bout a half second slower on my wits, or faster on my toes, I would have gutted him, because I was awake and terrified someone was coming right in, and I always have this Buck knife on me, even in my swim trunks, but the meeping Michael Myers mask and Cat in the Hat top hat was a special kind of nightmare material. Again last night, I dreamed he was lying in my hands, telling me he loved me as he bled out, and the ambulance wasn't responding fast enough.
You know what I'd give to be at sea right now?

Decider: Wotak

GrapeApe

godevillivedog

BeachGoat

spankerchief

middle_age_man

dragonstaff

shitbox

Wotak

Kids these days...

  • Wotak
  • Aug09 '11

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Sometimes you have to put a pet down for its own good.

Sounds like you have been poaching his Ambien.

  • BeachGoat
  • Aug09 '11

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Two weeks ago, a friend's 20 year old kid got dumped, with all of his worldly possessions, into our driveway by his girlfriend. I wouldn't leave a dog in the street, so we told him he could spend the ONE NIGHT, and find a place to go the next day. Next day came, and Dad, Mom, Brother, Grandma & Grandpa...NOBODY would return my calls (or his). Turns out he's just like your "Meathead". Took me two weeks to get the girlfriend to take him back. Bottles of meep in corners, that "spice" meep has destroyed my good pipe, burnt spots in the rug, and a smell that won't go away.

What is wrong with these kids?

  • bobacus
  • Aug09 '11

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    6257 rads

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Yeah, some commercial grade pipe cleaner, like that 420 solution will do the trick. You can always use denture cleaning tabs in a pinch on it too.We need to round these guys up and have them deathmatch each other for 40s of Mickeys.

  • MstrLance
  • Aug09 '11

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Get back at him by going to the bbq campout without him.

  • bobacus
  • Aug09 '11

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My ships reunion corresponds in Concord that week, and people want me there too, so I'm checking to see if anyone is driving across the US to that event also in hopes to catch a lift to CA. I'm also checking about some tickets.I could probably get some nice rig driver to drop me near you guys, as long as no meep is involved.
I'm checking. I do need to move this month though, and that is in its early planning stage.

  • BeachGoat
  • Aug09 '11

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@MstrLance

Get back at him by going to the bbq campout without him.

Our little demon has been removed. We've made it clear he is not to return.

  • MstrLance
  • Aug09 '11

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That's okay. I'm bringing a spare.

@BeachGoat

Hey, anonymous person! Log in and comment.
linkswarm
queue: New link: Partisans are all hypocrites
linkswarm
queue: New link: Disney accidentally invents paperman method
linkswarm
queue: New link: Dirty Bomb Blows Liberty
JohnLenin
turn it into a meep first
spankerchi+
How the meep do you keep a sammich fresh while shipping it to NC?
spankerchi+
spankerchi+
dragonstaf+
LOki
LOki
on Cold fusion, maybe p'raps?: OK, so methane on+
linkswarm
queue: New link: The NSA and the One Percent
tesco
middle_age+
linkswarm
queue: New link: Art for Art's Sake: Huge Kinetic Wind Sculptures
Crapalicio+
spankerchi+
spankerchi+
spankerchi+
tesco
on Cold fusion, maybe p'raps?: OK, so methane on+
tesco
spankerchi+
on Spanky's Pic Place: On the plus side;+
spankerchi+
on Spanky's Pic Place: Thanks a LOT, man.+
MstrLance
on Spanky's Pic Place: 1. Apply clamps to+
spankerchi+
on Spanky's Pic Place: I can't help but+
spankerchi+
on Spanky's Pic Place: 2013061612095073410FEth.jpg
MstrLance
Happy non-negligent jizzer day!
JohnLenin
Pats on the meep all 'round
JohnLenin
Yeah, congrats on jizzing inside of something and then not letting your mistake die from negligence.
spankerchi+
Happy Anniversary to all my fellow apostates of the rythm method! Clutch your bag of peas PROUDLY!
LOki
on Cold fusion, maybe p'raps?: You make enough+
dragonstaf+
spankerchi+
on YouTube graveyard and cadaver exchange: http://www.youtube.c+
tesco
tesco
tesco
on Cold fusion, maybe p'raps?: Loki You make enough+
tesco
on The man who quit money: Dragonstaff. It is+
linkswarm
queue: New link: My Dad Was in a Band
spankerchi+
It's time to get busy.
spankerchi+
Cleaning the garage this morning so's I have room to build. I gritted my teeth and threw out all the old bits of armor, too-heavy maille(10-12 gauge) and a sword blank I'll never get around to beveling.
LOki
on Spanky's Pic Place: HAHAHA! You'd be a+
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spankerchi+
on Spanky's Pic Place: Oh, speaking of+
spankerchi+
on Spanky's Pic Place: Obviously you doubt+
LOki
on Spanky's Pic Place: tesco torque+
LOki
on Spanky's Pic Place: Perpetual+
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on Spanky's Pic Place: We're having new+
MstrLance
on YouTube graveyard and cadaver exchange: http://www.youtube.c+
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on Spanky's Pic Place: [@LOki](http://www.l+
dragonstaf+
on Spanky's Pic Place: [@spankerchief](http+
linkswarm
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LOki
on Spanky's Pic Place: Nothing, according+
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on Spanky's Pic Place: Can someone tell me+
LOki
middle_age+
on He Puts His Visions Into Our World: I am so looking+
Senor_Smok+
on WWII VD ads.: Ouch
LOki
on Spanky's Pic Place: The Doctors were+
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