• Swarmed by
  • Lownotes
  • Dec25 '05
  • 1058 things

    46k rads

Nomads

I wrote a new short story for you to enjoy.

Decider: Admin

  • qwerty
  • Dec25 '05

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So much detail and character depth. However it seemed forced at points. With you're style of writing you could write erotica professionally!

  • Lownotes
  • Dec25 '05

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Tell me where it seemed forced. I'd like to take out any false walls.

  • Dumbskull
  • Dec25 '05

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Don't listen to Qwerty he doesn't know how to read.

Bloody brilliant. I wish I could write like that ( I wish I could write at all ) .

this is good stuff.

read the divingbell and the meeperfly written, most herorically, by a Jean Dominique Bauby, one paralized by a stroke and only able to communicate by the blinking of his left eye...

he managed to write a short book of 29 chapters by only blinking an eye--this my lownote friend, is a big deal. The kind that make prizes won, the kind that don't matter a flying meep in the whirl of the emotions around being around! I liked your story about the convalescent, the able but weak, the mentally challenged by the fury of living and the blindness of strife and the submission unto greater progress.

There are of course real examples, this is one, read it . It's worth it, but be prepared to be "low" for a day at least. I concur with the qwerty on the focus shifting about parts being played into for background that took themselves into forward focus--it's not going to be easy to do, so keep on doing it, I think it's not bad enough to mark as a "bad thing" actually, I encourage you to continue!

I enjoyed it, so despite whatever the meeps say, keep beating yourself up and churning this stuff out.

  • Lownotes
  • Dec26 '05

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Thank you much.

I'm still up in the air about the asides. I put them in there as choruses - something to read instead of a blank space to indicate time had passed. I love them, so it is hard to go through and delete them. I'll just have to let it sit and age for a while before I decide.

keep them.

only write what you enjoy to read--and more importantly, write. even if its a book full of only asides what matters is that the book/story/episode has come its full course.

I think the ability to interspace them will be the challenge though. Like cooking a fancy cake, or lasagana, there are layers and elements that occur only in spots but manage to transcend the whole--what are the elements that transcend and how do they do that?

That's the secret of the "secret" sauce, it's the interplay of elements that become greater than the sum; the resulting roar from the breath, the quivering and trembling afftereffects of the thunder--would we really be able to gauge anything by it's mere existence? or do we divine the occurence of greatness by the side dishes? The little specks of light, the motes of upset--those rustling pidgeons, that unlike us, are more delecate indicators of great movement?

If the villagers had realized that all the animals had fled, there would have been fewer tsunami victims a boxing-day ago... In the woods when the crickets stop chirping, there is a big thing nearby--it's probably you, but notice it. And then patent it, make it an assembly line process and you can be stephen king! [I am joking, i hope].

  • Tango
  • Dec27 '05

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More excellant work. Good mind.

Hey, anonymous person! Log in and comment.
spankerchi+
on Spanky's Pic Place: Meet Reuben and+
sunny77
more bothersome is an alleged male with a higher pitched voice than mine blathering on about disney movies in broken english
spankerchi+
Then you get a call from your bank and it's like: "Somebody tried to use your card in China." ...so suddenly you have to transition back into your normal voice?
spankerchi+
Hey, have you ever gotten so sick of telemarketer calls that you started using a "retard" voice?
sunny77
no one does frans like frans (i know who frans is! [not telling])
LOki
on Whale Poops on Divers: ![](http://s.linkswa+
BeachGoat
StartRecor+
FRANS SITS meepING SILENTLY STARING AT THE SCREENS...WAITING FOR RECIEVAL OR RELEASE OF meepUAL ANGER
StartRecor+
on The Rise of the Phoenix: yuo can say that+
spankerchi+
on The Rise of the Phoenix: Ah. Point taken.
spankerchi+
on The Rise of the Phoenix: Ah. Point taken.
dragonstaf+
on The Rise of the Phoenix: [@spankerchief](http+
BeachGoat
on The Rise of the Phoenix: Nicely Done!
spankerchi+
on The Rise of the Phoenix: Fantastic work, man.+
StartRecor+
Getting to be a meep is probably the best thing about getting old. no?
Pepper
I am a meep. Getting old sucks.
StartRecor+
on The Rise of the Phoenix: great job!
sunny77
linkswarm jumped the shark long ago but i'm not going to discourage certain swimmers from flailing about
dragonstaf+
on The Rise of the Phoenix: This project is+
sunny77
HAHAHA
HOBO
Ocelot
linkswarm
queue: New link: Whale Poops on Divers
StartRecor+
Jesus loves you anyway
meepbox
meep the world, meep a meep, meep these haters, get rich.
linkswarm
queue: New link: WE NEED TO REGULATE CARS THE WAY WE REGULATE GUNS
LOki
DS? sunny? https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=83ynTVMxPlQ
LOki
LULZ1
sunny77
linkswarm.com: where the non-elite make passive aggressive comments towards the financially stable
sunny77
yeah. its called the fbi
BeachGoat
Hoarders, not Swarmers. Although I am both.
BeachGoat
Isn't there a point that they can just burn them out like a leper pit?
sunny77
linkswarm.com: all time low
middle_age+
Hoarders : Buried Alive. Celebrity Edition. Mark my words.
BeachGoat
Thick Black Beer.
StartRecor+
Blaspheme! No Zin? No Cab? No Bordeaux?
sunny77
meeping rude
spankerchi+
So sayeth THE LORD.
spankerchi+
...then there will be two minutes of rest before laying into the divine body with a nice salad and maybe some garlic bread.
spankerchi+
...at which point though shalt add 2 tbspns of holy meeper and flip/marinade Him for another two minutes...
spankerchi+
...pan-fried (after the oil in the skillet starts to smoke a little) for 6 minutes, flipping the almighty every minute for a good initial caramelization...
spankerchi+
god is a well-marbled ribeye generously coated with salt and cracked pepper...
StartRecor+
Blessed is the man who remains steadfast under trial, for when he has stood the test he will receive the crown of life, which God has promised to those who love him.
HOBO
The meep has been slung
linkswarm
queue: New link: World Leaders On The Loo
sunny77
no
StartRecor+
Hi. Can I talk with you for a few minutes about Jesus Christ?
linkswarm
queue: New link: Serial Killer Cop Jailed For Murdering 22 Women
sunny77
bye
BeachGoat
Monkey meepskin walrus snot. I've had enough today.
BeachGoat
Pig loses to Thor on a Goat
meepbox
FTWORLD
sunny77
on YouTube graveyard and cadaver exchange: http://www.youtube.c+
BeachGoat
Wait until you're an old man, Sunnypie
linkswarm
queue: New link: There is more to Fight Club than meets the eye.
sunny77
you meep freaks
spankerchi+
Also waiting for test results from le heart exam and bloodwork.
spankerchi+
Gonna have to take a raincheck Goat. I'm still sick from spending all of Christmas and New-Year's in a house with no heat.
BeachGoat
As long as I can steam crab legs and melt meeper, I can find the scampi.
middle_age+
Too bad about steak and meep day.
BeachGoat
I wish it was. That's about all the action I'm getting in these senior years.
StartRecor+
Is "pet a baby goat" a euphemism?
sunny77
on Shouldn't have bought that PS4: you aren't meant to+
BeachGoat
You can still come pet a baby goat, Spanky. They went from kitten to terrier, but they're still cuteness therapy.
meepbox
on Shouldn't have bought that PS4: I don't understand.
sunny77
(:
spankerchi+
Ahh, THAT'S what I like about you sunny77; that was an emo chick move I just pulled. (meeping and not giving any details) Irritating, innit?
sunny77
on u put pitcures here: ![](http://fc08.devi+
sunny77
someone call the wambulance
spankerchi+
Not HORRIBLE.(Nobody's dead) But pretty fukkin BAD.
spankerchi+
This week was BAD.
sunny77
someone, somewhere is playing the worlds most imaginary violin
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