When we first started dating, one time we were laying together on my couch, and Haiku said that what we were doing “feels kinda wrong, but also, kinda sexy”. I looked her in the eyes, smiled, and kissed her.

...

“do you want to meet for lunch?” she asks

I pause for a second, I'm not sure what to think - but I figure it’d be good to talk and find out for sure what’s going on, so I say “yeah”. She tells me she’ll come up to my office and we’ll leave from there. (as she usually did before)

My office is kind of a room within a room kind of deal - there's also an entry hall leading into the larger room, and from my office you can see into this entry area out my door and across the larger room. So I would see her enter this hall; usually she'd look over at me and I'd smile at her as she came in. Today I didn't smile. I didn't know if I should have been worried, upset, pissed off, or what.
She comes in, and I get up and leave with her. My face is expressionless. We stop just outside in the hall, and the first thing she does is apologize for not calling. She told me that Jason was always there and she didn't want to call me with him around. We went downstairs and talked about the situation a bit on the way down. She said she actually wasn't very hungry, and I had no appetite so I suggested we just find a semi-private place to sit and talk. I knew of a slightly secluded area that got very little traffic so we went there. We sat outside in the cold and talked about the whole situation.
She confirms: Jason is in complete denial about the whole situation. I remember half-jokingly saying, "so Jason is crazy". Yeah.
We sat and talked for a long time - almost 2 hours. I felt a lot better about the situation after that, and before we parted I gave Haiku a big hug. It was the best hug in the world.

I saw Haiku briefly the following Wednesday - she was meeting her Korean friend for lunch after meeting me. Again, we sat outside and talked a little while. Amongst other things, we talked about Jason, and about how she needed to move out of the apartment and get her own place. We made plans to go looking for places Wednesday afternoon.

However, later that day I got a call. She said she had to do laundry with Jason; her cat had peed on the rug and she felt obligated to help clean it. We rescheduled for Thursday afternoon.
On Thursday again I got a call from her. She said that she needed to talk to Jason and wouldn't be able to apartment hunt with me. I said I understood, and we postponed it yet again.
Friday comes around, and some friends of mine and I were going to go to a jazz bar that night, and I had invited Haiku to come.

I was online Friday afternoon again, and Jason ends up contacting me on google chat again. I'd post the log, but it's really not worth it. He knows I'm going to a bar with Haiku and wants to know where we're going, if we'd be out late... It was very odd, and I felt like I was talking to her father in an odd sort of way. I go over to their place to pick her up, I wait in the little parking lot for her, and he's out there. He walks up to the car, I roll down my window and talk to him. We kind of made small talk; I had never actually been in their apartment, so he tells me which apartment they're in and such. Again, I felt like I was talking to someone's father waiting to take their daughter out on a date or something. Haiku comes out and gets in my car while I talk to Jason. Haiku has with her a big bag of stuff she brought me from Japan. She quickly shows it to me - dried squid, gummy candies I had while I was there, and a box of rice crackers. We drive off and we talk about how weird my encounter with Jason was - she tells me he's always like that - that they would have arguments and then later he would act as if nothing had happened. She said that's why she beleived there was an understanding that they weren't dating.

Me & Haiku head to the bar, and meet some of my friends there. We find a nice corner near them and sit and chat - with my friends and with each other. She tells me he wants her to stay there for another 6 months. I couldn’t believe she seemed to be entertaining the idea. I blurted out a frustrated “no..”. His reason being he's planning on going to Taiwan to learn Chinese then, and he told her he couldn't get a lease or afford rent anywhere if she moved out now. I told her she doesn't move out he's going to carry his delusion with him to Taiwan. We talk more about everything, and the night continues on, we drink and get tipsy. My friends leave, and finally me and Haiku are left (somewhat) alone for the first time since she's been back. I finally had a chance to do something I had been wanting to do ever since she got back - kiss her. They were deep, passionate kisses, there, in the corner of the bar. Or I was drunk. After a short while, the jazz band finishes playing, we finish our drinks, and leave the bar. It's probably no later than about 1:30. We decide that it'd be best for me to take her back to her place, so I do so. I stop in their parking lot - she hesitates, makes sure he's not there, and we kiss one last time before she gets out. I drive off, and looking behind me I see her standing there, smiling, watching me drive away.

I go home and pass out. In the morning, I notice my cell phone tells me she tried calling me twice at about 3:30am. I must have slept pretty heavy, because the phone was next to my bed and I didn't hear it. I get out of bed, and before long I’m online and who do you know messages me again. Now this is a log worth posting.


--start

Jason : so how's it going?
ottoshoes : they're alright
Jason : have fun last night?
ottoshoes : some
Jason : I gotta say, Haiku:s driving me nuts
Jason : we went out to eat... she was hungry... [a 24hr resturant about 5 blocks from my place]
ottoshoes : in what way?
Jason : ended up getting in an argument... not even sure how or why
Jason : we leave and she pulls a typical Haiku
Jason : starts walking away from the car and says she's walking to your house and that I should just leave her there
Jason : at 3 in the morning she wants me to drive home and leave her on [the street]
Jason : I ended up just picking her up, carrying her to the car and coming home..
Jason : that kindof behavior just doesn't make any sense.. like a kid who pouts when she doesnt get her way
Jason : damn spoiled
ottoshoes : thats not a very respectful thing for you to do either
Jason : sorry, I just need to vent and she won't talk... just being stubborn
Jason : well. I'm not going to leave her on there at 3 in the morning
Jason : our neighbor just got mugged down here about 3 nights ago, and she knows that
Jason : I don't know...
Jason : I guess there's nothing to do, I just wish she'd be cooperative
Jason : I'm not trying to push her around, but I need her to communicate
Jason : I can't just cut her off or be cut off after her being the center of my world for so long...
ottoshoes : maybe she's tired of communicating?
ottoshoes : you can only talk so long
Jason : that's rediculous, and she should be able to figure that out...
Jason : my telling her is pretty clear I think
Jason : she's just stubborn
ottoshoes : as are you
Jason : I've told her, she can do anything she wants to, just don't hurt me..
Jason : have some respect for the feelings of the person you've shared your live with all this time
Jason : is that too much to ask?
ottoshoes : that's like saying, you can do whatever you want, as long as you're in this cage
Jason : and she gets pissed off about that
Jason : what cage? don:t be a slut or a bitch?
Jason : I'm not asking anything we don't expect of other people anyway
Jason : typically, thats the kind of behavior that soceity repremands people for anyway
Jason : and she knows I 'm not staying here past the summer...
Jason : and she says she's gonna stay here till she can get an associates, at least another 2 years
Jason : so wht's the damn hurry?
Jason : she's just being stubborn and not caring about what she does to other people...
Jason : I'm really frustrated
ottoshoes : the way i understand it, is she's unhappy in your relationship and thinks it should end
ottoshoes : and you want to postpone that?
Jason : if she wanted to break up she could be rational about it
ottoshoes : and keep her unhappy?
Jason : that's not what I'm saying.... I'm saying I have a heart too, and the world doesn't revolve around her
ottoshoes : but you have to be rational about it too
Jason : how so? just let her move out and fuck up my world without a complaint?
ottoshoes : remember when i was talking about athiesm and how each of us is our own gods?
Jason : if she wanted to break up heres what she should do
Jason : tell me... talk about it, take time
Jason : she certainly thinks she is
Jason : she's trying to do everything NOW
Jason : I need time this is rediculous
ottoshoes : and you said you then recognise that everyone else is also their own god. I agreed. The sense she conveys to me is that you are not letting her be her own god
Jason : we live together... if she moves I have to to, and I'm not here long enough to sign a lease somewhere
Jason : what's the hurry?
Jason : well... she's spoiled
ottoshoes : then are you ok with us dating while you two are still living together?
Jason : I think she should have been spanked as a child and never was
Jason : fuckd you ottoshoes
Jason : you keep away from her
Jason : I'm getting real pissed off
Jason : she doesn't need to be dating anybody
Jason : not good for her, and sure
Jason : and sure gonna make an enemy for you if you do that

--end

So, at this point, he just disconnected. I don't know wtf this dude is going to do, so I call Haiku and make sure everything's ok.