Spanky's Pic Place

Drawer pulls, poplar dowels, custom printing on canvas and a few coats of acrylic and two different types of paint.

Have a little peek :)

Superlative epithets do not suffice.

I am so glad I'm Goat. You can not climb this meep with out.

If I ever get ahold of a decent geode, I'm totally making one of these:

When I got home from work today, Pepper handed me a big, brown UPS box. Inside there a ton if pink peanuts (for my pink elephant), and an articuled Dremel with a full set of bits. Pepper is going to bling out about 10 of the cutlasses Pirate Queen style for the female participant, and this will be a GodSend.

Thank You, Lord Spanky
A blasphemous idol will be made in your image

Goat

You are quite welcome, Master Goat!
It's the least I could do to pay you back for the storage and for helping stage the event.

We are the music-makers, And we are the dreamers of dreams, Wandering by lone sea-breakers, And sitting by desolate streams. World-losers and world-forsakers, Upon whom the pale moon gleams; Yet we are the movers and shakers, Of the world forever, it seems.
-O'Shaughnessy

Gettin' faster.

@spankerchief

What is the timber you have used for those, Spanky? Is it Maple?

Birch and oak blades. Walnut strips on the handle.

Beautiful.

If you have a spare, I would love to buy one from you.

Heh, thanks. :)
Gonna have to see what shipping to Adelaide is gonna be like.
(Probably ten times the sword's actual worth)

250lb 3/16" woven rope & 1" sch 40 conduit.

...Shenanigans :)

Oops, I meant 3/8"

I've been up and down those cliffs as a kid. I hope nobody gets kilt.

Amen brother.

The climbing/jumping bits will be done by healthy, sober pirates ONLY.
There's also a waiver to kind of help cover my meep.
Not that you're ever REALLY safe from litigious meeps here in Cali.

Tested 20' of rope ladder at work today.
Tied it to an industrial sprinkler pipe bolted to the ceiling beams.
There was about two feet of stretch overall (The first rung I stepped on went right to the floor) but after that, the rope held up nicely, the rungs stayed fairly level and there was suprisingly little bounce.
I need to keep the rung spaces at 1' or less though. Anything more is gonna be a b#tch to grab when you're tired.

Mighty sailin' vessel fer exploring seacaves.
Option #2 if rope ladder climbing isn't yer strong suit.(I.E. Yer a big lard-meep)

I've got a few life vests too if you look like you might sink it.
No telling who's gonna win the maps, so I'm taking into account that it might be nothing but wheezing, 350lb pimple-faced virgins.
You all disgust me.
DROP AND GIMME TWENTY, MAGGOTS!

I don't remember what I was supposed to do with the apricot brandy.
F#ck it. I'm drinkin' it.

Man, it really picked up that apricot flavor.
Now I really wish I'd used dried peaches instead.

The deadly part is the fruit itself...that's where the alcohol is hiding.

Le titty chest progress:


Why the f#ck did I make this thing out of walnut?
I'm having a meep of a time carving it.

Man, It's a good thing I've got two months to finish this.

Is there no end to your talents?

The charm of making seems to be working well.

(Where are the meep?)

Thanks!
I was wondering if anybody got the Excalibur reference.
(I loved the armor in that movie and always wondered how they made Merlin's skullcap/helmet)
I've got to get this edge decoration all carved first. Then I'll start relief-cutting around everything so that it all stands out.
@dragonstaff

@spankerchief

You wondered how they made it, I just wanted one like it.

Sure, you can think that way if you wanna miss out on making a whole lot of work and expense for yourself.
...Wait, that didn't come out right...
@dragonstaff

Anyway...PROGRESS!

Excaliber! I knew that spell sounded familiar, but it's been about 30 years since I've seen that movie.

Incidentally, Arthur and his knights would have worn mail hauberks, not the articulated plate armor you see in the movie. That stuff wouldn't come on the scene for another 800 years or so. But you probably knew that already.

Honestly, I'm terrible with timelines.
Arthur in stainless plate armor?
(shrugs) Cool by me.
...but yeah, it really would've been boiled leather, cloth, wood, bone, iron or bronze shaped into maille or lamillar or whatever.
The design could've been any amalgam of Roman, German, Carthaginian, or Celtic tech.
Everything was stolen from somewhere else(mostly from the Romans who had the closest thing to uniformity, I think) but nobody kept track and all we have are bits and pieces being unearthed to tell the story.
...Or so I think.
I could be misinformed.

Wait...THIRTY YEARS?
Holy meep.
Suddenly: Age awareness.

@spankerchief

Wait...THIRTY YEARS? Holy meep. Suddenly: Age awareness.

That meep hurts when it hits you that hard, doesn't it.

Why is it hard to breathe?!

Motherf#cking meepbag sh#teating d#ckwrangling smurfc#ck meepsnorting meepgargling waste of goddamned lumber son of a meep!!
AAAAAAAAAUUUUUUUUGH!!
(panting)

Just broke my last blade.
Got this far before it happened though:

Looks like that's it for today.